fail

so im suppose to be skating right now...but somehow forgot my board at work... I dont even know how I forgot it. So im just gonna type whatever comes to mind right now since I dont want to kill the fun for my friends. Playing music and watching my friends have fun is something I love doing. Music can set the mood for any moment and right now everyones loving dubstep. I'm also talking to this guy I like and might just have the courage to ask for his number. we shall see.

The thing is though I still have feelings for someone else. We used to talk like crazy. I would skype with her, call her on the phone, text, even email her when I was stuck in class, but now its like none of those past couple of months have ever happened. I told her I liked her and that I'm okay with just being friends, and she was genuinely happy with that...or so she told me. She would text me sometimes and we would keep it going all day, but I think its my pride that wont let me text her unless she texts me first. I want to talk to her, I love talking to her but sometimes I get the feeling shes just using me to kill her boredom. I know other people like her and have a better chance. Im just a filler for when shes bored. that hurts the most.
I miss telling her good morning and she would tell me good night. I miss that one last text message or phone call that put a smile on my face right as Im about to fall asleep. She would always send me a good morning text eventually too and it was just perfect.

I think Im just goint to stay forever alone and watch people be happy from afar. it doesnt hurt as much and life is simple that way.

hahahaha my friend just ate shit right now trying to jump off a railing, I should go help him but I dont want to move and someone else is already helping him lol. im horrible.

Feel Good Drag by Anberlin is a song that I will always love