Monday, September 6, 2010

stepping down

Being the oldest sister is a pain in the ass, but i honestly wouldnt have it any other way. My family means the world to me and i would do a lot for them. In the begining of the year I lost my grandma and I had to step up and help fill in her place in the house. I hated it for a couple of days, having to do so many things around the house not being able to see my friends as much just being exhausted. But one day i just gave up and ditched my family to just go out and be a kid again, got home went straight to bed. There is always going to be a Yin and Yang to everything, and I found it out the hard way. You realize your family needs you when it feels like your the only thing holding them up, and its felt like that ever since my grandma passed.

My grandma was born on October 17th 1932 her birthday is just a month away and its so hard without her around the house, and I guess Ive been driving my sisters crazy. So I guess this morning my sister had the courage to tell me that I dont need to worry as much anymore, that shes trying to step up and take more responsibility with the family...and didnt that just make me want to cry. and yeah it did. I dont have to hold up my family anymore. I can depend on others again like I depended on my grandma.

I miss her a lot but I have others in my family i can depend on. and my friends too